Help Me Out With The Baby, Honey!

I didn’t sign up for this! That’s the silent scream in my head every time my husband is sound asleep while I’m “Sleepless in Santolan (Seattle)” taking care of our one year old-son.

There’s nothing else in the world that I love doing right now than to nurture my baby, but, every six months, I also get tired. I’m a superwoman, you know! Ehem!!!

My husband sees me like that because he said I am married to a superman. Funny, but it’s true. He is my superman, next to God of course.

Superman is a fictional character who can do almost anything as long as kryptonite is not around. My husband can’t fly nor can he freeze water just by breathing on it. And there are hundreds of other things he cannot do but still, he is my superman.

Superman is completely different from us and he is endowed with tremendous power and so is my husband. He is not like me or anyone else in the world; except for his addiction to pizza and movies. He is unique in so many ways and it takes a crazy and a funny woman like me to understand him. He also has the power to make my life miserable or not. The kind of power he has is definitely not the same as superman’s but it’s stronger and it can affect generations.

After being married to him for seven years now, I came to know what are his likes and dislikes, his interests, his dreams, his strengths and of course his weaknesses. The last word was the first one I noticed from day one but his strengths were noticed barely a month ago. Hahaha!!! That’s the problem. I always see what’s wrong with him rather than what’s good and positive. And that is a kryptonite. My words are like kryptonite weakening the strength and the power of my own superman.

In 2005, while we were in the hearth of God’s purifying furnace, I unceasingly plead to God to change my husband. I asked him to make my husband like me because I’m bright, independent, aggressive, and perfect! Huh!!! That’s how I saw myself before. Good thing God didn’t agree with me and I felt sort of frustrated. I didn’t get my way. Instead, I learned from the Bible that wives must completely submit to their husbands and must serve them, for they are the head of the family. Women’s role is to be the helper of their spouse.

I know that principle before we got married but I didn’t bother to let it sink to my soul. I just went along and did my own way. There was a time when my husband and I were in the same band and basically we work together outside. But, I still had to do all the chores in the house. I always complained and kept telling God that it’s not fair. I still have to serve him? What?!!! But the obedient girl I am (applause please!), I yielded to God’s instruction.

I could say that when I stopped grumbling, even though I had more work load than my husband, things became easier for me. It’s easier and much lighter in the inside. It’s not about who’s better anymore but it’s about what else can I do for me to show love. I no longer compete or compare but I complement. And it’s like moving out from a crowded and suffocating world to a smog-free, spacious, and peaceful one.

God designed man to be the head and the woman the helper. The latter is not weaker but strong. God knows that man has a heavier burden of leading and providing for the family and he needs all the support he could get to accomplish that.

The world right now is in chaos because part of that is women do not let the men lead. Wives disrespect their husbands in front of their children. Men are not the authority anymore in the family. Wives compare themselves with their husbands instead of understand. Btw, do you know that men can focus one task at a time? It’s not their fault. It’s just that, that’s the kind of wiring they need to have because they are the leader. They need to focus.

Regardless if you earn more than your husband or you have more work load than him, you still need to let him lead. You still have to respect, serve, and love him. And when you do that, things will change. All of a sudden he will help you with the laundry, he will be more attentive to you when you talk to him, and he will be more caring and loving. Love begets love.

So…… let you and I plant the seed of understanding, patience, kindness, and love even if they are not perfect and ideal. We are doing ourselves a favor. Besides, our children will see that our character is worth following and it will have a great impact to them without our knowing.

Let us love and understand our husbands unconditionally. Then and only then, love will flourish in our homes. It will be contagious and will convict and inspire anyone around it.

Do you want to see your husband become the superhero that your children will be proud of? Don’t be a kryptonite. Rather, be the yellow sun; because that’s what makes superman strong.

I believe that we have a vital role to play to shape the course of the future. Let’s empower, support, and help our husbands and let our children see that so that they will be secured and have something worth following in the future. Let’s build a strong home, superwomen!

NOT SCRAMBLED EGGS AGAIN PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Five years ago, our helper started working in a restaurant. We pushed her to seize her dream. And so, I was left to do all the household chores until we found a new one. I got sick due to over fatigue and my husband started to cook for us. The first time he served his specialty was a delight and a surprise for me and my daughter. We savor the taste because it was cooked with love. The next meal we had was the same dish that he served in the morning and the next meal after the next was still the same sumptuous dish on our plate. I was sick for three days and all I had was the delicious SCRAMBLED EGGS.

The cloying experience of that egg- phenomenon in our house was full of fun and laughter. The truth is, during that time, we had no money and that was all we could afford. We hit rock bottom.

I never thought that you can truly laugh and be overwhelmingly happy even when there’s nothing left in your bank account. I was glad that my family experienced lack. We learned how to be content and be thankful in the midst of it. We knew that it was just a season; A season of trusting God and holding on to Him.

Sometimes I forget to appreciate what’s on my plate, the car that we have, the house we live in, and the constant effort of my husband to provide for us.

One time, I had this great jealousy with Jinky Pacquiao, the wife of Manny Pacquiao. I got so envious of her fortune, fame, and comfortable life. I started seeing what I don’t have and I became grumpy and cranky. Thank God, my sanity was restored and my discontent was gone. That was after my husband told me that he will go for a full time boxing career. I was shocked at first. And I told him that he doesn’t have to do it. But he insisted. And so I started singing and dancing.

It was a dream! The conversation was a dream!!! Poor me! My dream of living the life of rich and famous was down in the abyss. Am I gonna eat scrambled eggs again?

You see, whether I eat scrambled eggs every day for the rest of my life, I will still be happy. I will still appreciate my husband for his effort. Of course there will be days that I will fast because it’s part of my spiritual journey. Hahahaha! But really, I have learned the secret of being content whether in lack or in plenty. I know that life is not about living in style and in comfort but it’s about living it with contentment and laughter.

You may have been eating the same food for days. Just like that scrambled egg that my husband fed us with for three days. It was bland yet filling; It filled us with insightful lessons, great memories and strength.

All I want to say is that, savor and enjoy your own scrambled eggs with your husband and kids. Don’t let your circumstance deprive you of the fun and adventure you can have. Life is short and it is full of miracles. You just need to see it with eyes of hope and thanksgiving.

The big things in life are not the money, houses, nor fame. We already have them: Husband, kids, parents, friends, and family. I’m pretty sure that they will also have fun eating scrambled eggs with you and I as long as we heartily and thankfully eat it with them.

Let’s not blame our spouse if all he can feed us is that yellow and soft thing on our plate. Let’s give them a big hug and say…………. “Can you put some onions and tomatoes please?!”

Live Life!

WHY ON EARTH AM I MARRIED TO THIS GUY?

Why didn’t I see it before? Why did I let my emotions blind me? Why didn’t I meet this ideal guy in the office before? WHY?????!!!!!!!

WAAAAHHHHH!!!! Are you crying at night because you’re so frustrated with your husband? Do you sometimes feel like leaving him and just attend to yourself, career, and kids? Do you want to sometimes strangle him or maybe just wish the genie to make him disappear? I did before. But that was years and yea………………rs ago(hahaha).

I love my husband so much and I am so happy, blessed and complete because next to God, he is my joy. That’s not how I felt about him during the first two years of our marriage. Before, all I see in him was the negative; His weaknesses, his shortcomings, his bad habits, and his failures. I was always complaining. Always mad. Always sarcastic. Always unhappy. The only time that I would really smile was when he would fall flat on his face because he didn’t listen to me. And I rejoiced in that. I would even tell my friends that he made this huge mistake because he didn’t listen to Muah (me)!!!!! Because in the past, it’s all about Muah (me), Muah (me), Muah (me)!!!

Yes! I was so full of myself. I was proud. I was self-seeking. I was selfish. That’s why I was blind and unteachable before. It’s not so easy to admit one’s foible but it’s the starting point towards change. There was a time when I was nagging my husband that I got so irritated with my voice. I realized that I was really like a monster and I am not worth emulating by my children. It was such a turning point in my “nagging and complaining career”.

To be a good wife is not an overnight thing. It’s a process and a commitment at the same time. We have to let go of our old habits, our unrealistic standards, and our competitive selves. When we said yes to our husbands on our wedding day, we also said yes to the gamut of their idiosyncrasies.

So why on earth are you married to your husband? First, so that you can be loved by an imperfect man because you’re an imperfect woman. Second, so that you can be cared by a limited and a weak man because you are also a limited and a weak woman. Thirdly, so that you can be protected, be provided, and be led by the not so ideal man because you are not so ideal as well. I don’t mean to be harsh but it’s the truth. You and I are not perfect. So let’s stop demanding. Let’s just accept and love them for what they are.

I was liberated and freed when I started appreciating my husband than criticizing him. I realized that my relationship with him is more important than all my expectations being met. The person is more important than the situation. Your husband is more important than your standards and rules. I stopped teaching him. (I slip from time to time!!!!) I refrain from talking before thinking. ( I breathe deeply and then I would talk a lot ) Kidding aside, I deliberately shut my mouth and just let the moment pass. It works!

You and I will never be perfect wives neither our husbands but we can be a loving one. For the past five years, I could say that my husband has grown to be more certain about where he wants to take our family because he knows I’m at his back supporting him. He knows that I won’t lambast him to my friends and family even if he fails because I will protect him. I am my husband’s partner in all areas of life. I’m his best friend. I’m one with him since the day we got married and I won’t hurt him because I will get hurt too.

So again, why on earth are you married to your husband? So that you will experience the beauty and essence of life in the challenges, ups and downs, trials, and victories that you will share with your husband. So that you will become more beautiful in the inside as you love, understand, and serve your husband.

Today, start saying I appreciate you my husband. I love you and I will always be here for you. You will see the result in no time. A successful marriage and a strong home are in your hands to make as you let God help you and lead you.

Live life!

Best Places to Invest

When I hear the word investment, my brain would suddenly create a picture of money, bank, house, and insurance. Investment is something that’s not discussed by me and my friends on a regular basis during lunch or coffee-break. It’s a big word; only for the big men and women who can afford and understand it. Besides, why bother when it’s too far my grasp.

I’m a mother of two and we have a business that’s fairly growing. Our investment knowledge I would say is very limited. Been going through the net to educate myself and for more than five years, I could say that it’s not so easy to start a real investment. And so as I keep on begging God to pour at least a million dollars so we expand our business, help the poor, eradicate illiteracy (hahaha), and make an Investment, I realized that INVESTMENT is not entirely about putting money to grow money.

There are other more important investments that we should put high premium than saving that paper bill. Ooops! Don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying that you just be a profligate and be reckless with your money. What I want us to understand is that we don’t have to be bitter and sad, and jealous when our friend or a sibling is making great investments. We have to see the bigger picture.

Have you been drinking enough water lately? Have you been eating a hefty portion of veggies and fruits for the past week? Maybe you want to make an Investment on your Physical Health. Yes! Invest on that biological machine that you are using every day. HEALTH is WEALTH. There were so many famous, powerful, and rich folks who did not enjoy what they had because they were sick. Check your life style as well. Have enough rest and don’t drink and smoke. They’re just fun for a while but you’re gonna pay a very high price soon (I did!) .Take your vitamins. Take supplements as well. Here’s a link for you to check the best supplement available in the market right now. http://www.comparing-vitamin-supplements.com/

Another great area to invest is on your love ones. Investment on Emotional Health. Invest time, love, patience, and words of encouragement to them. Have you done that lately? If not, do it as soon as you can. There’s no point of having all the riches, fame, and success when your home, your children, and your marriage is a wreck. Life is about sharing, pursuing, believing, laughing, dancing, and singing with these people. A happy and complete home is far greater than Gold.

The greatest investment anyone can make in his entire life is this one, Investment on Spiritual Health. Start putting God and His agendas first. Pause and assess if the things you are doing right now are self-seeking or God-centered. Put aside worldly desires and live for the Lord. There is no better place to be than in God’s hands. No matter how brilliant, well-connected, aggressive, good-looking, and articulate you are, apart from God you will still feel empty, sad and incomplete. God is the beginning and the end of life. That is why the first three areas that I mentioned are more important than the financial investment we know about. It’s so easy to squander any amount if you’re lost, emotionally unstable, hurt, mad, jealous, bitter, and greedy. Been there, done that and all I can say is that you will never go wrong with God.

The last investment to make is the Financial Investment. People put this investment at the top of the list that’s why they neglect their health, family and good moral standard just to secure this one. They eventually forget the essence of life. They get into illegal business transactions while others loan money just to speed up the realization of their dreams. It’s good to have an ideal financial standing in life but money is not the end, it’s just a tool. It’s not God, not even our source of self worth or sense of acceptance. Parents work to death because they want to give their children the best. In the end, their absence can’t be compensated with money and material things because those two are temporary while time spent lingers. Are you getting this? I hope I am able to add something valuable to your life today.

Let me now proceed to financial investment.

To be financially-free, you have to be debt-free. Personal debts and business debts are totally different. If you are in deep personal debt, stop buying unnecessary things like clothes, shoes, gadgets, and other items that are not part of your basic needs. Start living below your means and little by little settle your accounts. This will surely bring peace and freedom to you and to your family as well.

If you’re business incurs more debt that receivables, you have to stop borrowing and start assessing your next move. Do not cave in to embarrassment that your business flopped. Save yourself from bigger trouble. Look for someone who can help you make an intelligent and practical solution for your situation. Your failure won't be a permanent one when you're willing to make some adjustments and some sacrifices. Be creative and educate yourself more on how to manage your business and your money efficiently. It takes consistent application of correct approach for any business to succeed.

If you want to make an investment and don’t know how to start , this link can help you https://www.citiseconline.com/Final2/B_home_new/HOME.asp.

After all these years, I learned that the essentials in life are not so hard to achieve as long as we know what they are. Being financially free is important and necessary and we must acquire the knowledge on how to do it. Being healthy physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually is doable by you and I. We don’t need tons of money to be able to do that and to be rich in life. Just invest on the right places and you will surely reap more than your wildest imagination.

There is a time for everything and a season for every activity under heaven. Ecclesiastes 3:1 Now is the time to make those great investments!